Help me fix my Kidnapper Van!

Glad to hear you got most of it sorted out!!! Might want to change that bulb while your into it. They should have a wall of fame for stuff like that...

 

With all the new stuff that is on the market, I still have'nt found anything that works better than K&W Trans-X. I grew up with my dad being a car dealer, and he used his share of it, and i've seen it work automotive miracles. I still use to this day, and at every transmission fluid change that I do, whether it be on my personal vehicles, or someone elses. The stuff is just plain good. If a transmission is slipping due to tarnish or sticking valves, it will fix it.

 

I'm a Trans-X believer myself. That was the first thing to come to my mind, will definitely be trying it. Now I just need to decide whether I feel like draining a quart first or just dumping it in there...

 

Well the Trans-X wasn't enough to save this one. Lost all forward gears.

It happened about five miles from home. Started slipping more in third, but I knew if I could get it up to 50 and let it shift into OD it would hold. Too many traffic lights, though. I limped it most of the way back, then along came a hill about a mile from home that I just couldn't handle and I thought, "Hm. I bet I still have reverse."

And sure enough I did. I brought her stern around, hit the flashers and went on home. I backed up to my garage which barely accommodates this vehicle, saw my wife outside and motioned her over...

"Hey dear. I only have reverse. You're gonna have to help me get this thing into the garage."

"Huh?!?"

"I only have reverse."

"How did you get here?!?"

"Backwards."

"!?!"

"Yes, we can talk about what a maniac I am later, but for now let's park this."

And then I parked it.


...So, what now? In case you haven't already noticed, I am unwilling to put any real money into this van. The Maverick and the Wifemobile get top-level service, but this vehicle gets duct tape and coat hangers. The van is for making money, not costing it, so it must be fixed for as close to nothing as possible, else I need to get rid of it. Junkyard trans is about the only solution I can see right now, except maybe putting brake lights on the grille. Unless you guys know of any last-ditch effort I can make to save this trans. Does the 4R70w have bands like the C4? Can I tighten those and maybe get some more life out of it?

Other options I'm willing to consider if I can do them cheap- C4/C6 swap, manual swap, or if I can find a combo for cheap I'd love to just put a 302/351/300 in there with a carb and a non-computerized transmission and be done with all these electronics. Every little sensor, valve, switch solenoid and doodad scattered all over this drivetrain is just another time bomb waiting to leave me stranded. Maybe I can get somebody's 400M or 351M for next to nothing, since nobody seems to like those engines.

Simplest plan first though. I need to find out what cars and what years will have a compatible transmission, then check out the Pull-A-Part.

 

Cross-posted here on ford-trucks.com forums.

 

Sorry to hear about your transmission. Sounds like too big a miracle was needed in your case. Were you having trouble with third gear prior to pulling the pan? It's funny how it could go through the strain of taking off in second or third gear, but when you fix it to work properly, it just quits. I checked my tech book, and it does'nt have the r470w in it. I was hoping the damage was'nt as extensive as it apparently is.

 

I don't know, man I really don't. That's a puzzle. No, it was not slipping at all until I replaced those solenoids.

 

Well I'm planning a transmission swap this weekend. The van needs to roll under its own power, and do it while going forward. I was going to just put brake lights on the front but the wife doesn't like that idea.

I posted the following on ford-trucks.com. Just in case somebody here is familiar enough with the 4r70w transmission to give me an answer, I'll post it here too:

 

That's accurate from what I know. If you decide to get a pre-'97 tranny, take the time to pull the valve body and change the accumulator pistons to the updated style.
Why are you leaving out certain years on the donor list? A '97 TBird/Cougar should work as well.
Other possible donors are F150s and Mustangs.

 

Thanks, Randy!

Those vehicles are on the list simply because that's what is available at my local Pull-A-Part. Most of the time when they get a Mustang in, it's skeletonized within a week. Trucks don't keep their drivetrains for long either.

Another possible complication... They drain all fluids when the cars come in. In the case of a transmission, this often means the pan is missing. I'll have to look very carefully for signs that the valve body has hit the ground or a forklift, etc. And I won't be able to look at the fluid unless maybe I can drain the converter. Will have to come up with some other way to check for signs of wear.

I really hope I can find a donor that looks like it was hit hard, burned, threw a rod, etc. Pull-A-Part's guarantee means I can go get another trans if I get a bad one, but that doesn't cover labor, trans fluid or collateral damage resulting from uncontrollable fits of rage...

 

We have the same problem with Mustangs here.

I hate that - why not just punch a hole in the pan.

Anyway, I should have mentioned that the old accumulator pistons were aluminum with a rubber o-ring. They would wear out fast and cause wear on the bore in the case, eventually causing leakage that ended in bad shifting, shuddering, and lots of shavings in the pan. The new style are steel wrapped in rubber and are much more reliable.

I also thought of another donor - Lincoln Mark VIII. They are on the MN12 platform (Thunderbird/Cougar), but they had a 32 valve 4.6.
Edit: I see this is already on your list.

 

Why not just buy a trans rebuild kit and fix the one you got? the 4r70w is pretty easy. If you take your time and don't have too many "where does this go?" problems you could save a lot of dough.

 

I might rebuild it once I get the junkyard trans installed. For now, this is quick cheap...

 

Junk yard transmission obtained! Stay tuned...

 

Argh.

So Saturday morning I went to Pull-A-Part with a friend at 8am, found a nice '97 Grand Marquis with relatively low miles and perfectly clean transmission fluid. First wrench turned at 9am, transmission on the ground at 10am. It went beautifully, and I was out of there before the sun even got hot. On closer inspection it looked as if the transmission I scored might even be a rebuild! Couldn't believe the luck.

Got it home, my friend had other obligations so he left, then I had some lunch and my other help arrived around noon. We dropped the trans out of the van, then swapped everything that needed to be swapped from the old trans to the new one. Went and bought some fluid and a filter, got back and and started to raise that thing.

I don't have a trans jack, so this part went slowly. Two floor jacks and a couple of 2x4's. At one point the transmission fell. The jacks caught it, but it landed squarely on my right hand, pinning my palm between the top of the jack and the pan. That sucked, but it only put me out of the game for a couple of minutes. The pain didn't really start until much later.

Eventually we got it lined up and bolted on. Breaked for dinner, then my friend had to go. But with the bellhousing bolts installed I could handle it alone from there. By 8pm I'd buttoned everything up, taken the van off its jackstands and started adding fluid.

I raised the garage door. A vision of warming it up, checking the fluid and shifting through each position on the column before taking it out for a triumphant lap around the neighborhood had kept me going tirelessly for twelve hours, ignoring heat, fatigue and pain. I could almost taste my victory now, but it was not to be.

I started the engine. It sounded like Satan's fingernails grinding down a thousand tempered steel chalkboards in hell.

I shut it off, and then it all caught up to me. All the cuts, bruises and even a burn I'd been able to disregard until now sang out in an evil chorus to let me know they were there. My right hand throbbed. I could barely move it enough to put the keys back in my pocket. My spine demanded full payment with interest for the endurance it had loaned me throughout the day as I'd lifted and carried transmissions, torqued and twisted my body underneath that damnable hulk of metal.

I hobbled inside, kept enough composure to smile and kiss my son goodnight, then I took a shower and went to bed. I have even not looked at that van since then. Sunday morning everything hurt. My dear wife brought me four Advil, a muscle relaxer and a caffeine pill, and then I was able to get up. We took our son to a museum, had bratwurst for dinner and then I took him out for ice cream. I wasn't able or willing to lend a single thought to that van. It stole a day from me and I stole one back.

Can't just pretend it's not there forever though. I can only assume the torque converter wasn't fully engaged. It must have come loose when it fell on my hand, and I was too busy screaming in pain to think about it.

Y'all think there's any chance I can just push the transmission back, re-seat the converter and go? Or did those few seconds of grinding ruin it?